“I have been living with Irritable Bowel Syndrome for over 30 years,” says Janelle (Davis, CA), “and while there’s been ups and downs and certainly some embarrassment, I’ve emerged alright.”

 

In the midst of an IBS flare-up, it is easy to think you can’t lead a normal life. “Sometimes it gets so bad, I think I’ll have to quit my job,” says Daniel (Ames, IA). But you can make it – just don’t be afraid to excuse yourself to go to the bathroom. If you do it more frequently then the average person, even in the middle of a meeting, don’t sweat it. If someone notices a prolonged visit, the worst they can do is ask if you are okay. And the worst thing you can do is to simply tell them. No big deal.

 

“I tell people at work I have a syndrome that makes me have to go to the bathroom a lot. They hear the word “syndrome” and get it. I don’t have to explain anymore, and usually never again,” says Janelle. Rely on people’s natural sense of compassion and professionalism.

 

 

“My wife is my best supporter,” says Rick (Madison, WI). “She knows as well as I do where the bathrooms are in the grocery store, the hardware store, and everywhere in between. She keeps me on my regular schedule of fiber and helps me monitor what I eat. If anything, this chronic irritable bowel disorder has brought us closer.”

 

Your close relationships are the best way for you to build a team to support you. “My mother calls me to make sure I took my medication,” says Laura (Sante Fe, NM), “because sometimes I forget when I’m been symptom free for a while. She knows how painful it is when I get lax and have a flare-up.”

 

Karin is a 24 year old who is terrified of the dating scene. “Everywhere I go, I’m scouting the bathroom. And when I excuse myself after meals, I’m paranoid that they think I have bulimia. But fessing up to having a bowel syndrome is almost as bad.” Maybe the first date isn’t the time to tell someone your medical history. But if you want someone who is supportive in your life, hiding it isn’t the best way to foster intimacy. Instead, when the time is right, tell them and see what kind of person you’re dating. It could be the best way to sort the princes from the frogs.

 

 

I’m sure you know all the bathrooms between here and there. But that’s just a start. Traffic can come out of nowhere, even along your most traveled routes. “I keep an emergency Port-a-Potty in the car with a towel, babywipes, and extra underwear,” says Patty (Naples, FL). “That way I can pull over if I absolutely have to and jump into the back seat.”

 

While you may want to forego ambitious travel that requires extensive time en route, you can opt for shorter sojourns to a resort on the beach. “I go to the beach every year with my family,” says Ken (Atlanta, GA). “We stay at a comfortable resort where I have easy access to the bathroom, in case my diarrhea rears its ugly head.”

 

 

We all go through hard times. Divorce, job loss, and bickering with those we love can cause a lot of stress. “I know hard times aren’t called that for nothing,” Caroline (Littleton, CO) says, “but when things get rough, I find I am also in physical pain from my IBS. Once I made the connection between my anxiety and my symptoms, I decided to do something about it.” Caroline enrolled in yoga, learned to meditate, and started seeing a psychologist to learn to manage her stressors. “I realized that I could control my thoughts. I can make my symptoms worse by freaking out and panicking, or I can use the practical tools I learned and relax.”

 

Your mind and your body are linked. Learn to use this to your advantage, rather than letting your emotions send a rampage through your bowels.

 

 

Managing your symptoms is up to you. There is ample advice for you to follow, but you know your body best, and only you can apply that advice. Try things, experiment, and pay attention to how these things make you feel. “It was when I really took charge that everything began to turn around,” Janelle says. “Not only do I have fewer flare-ups and accidents, but – most importantly -- I no longer feel like a victim to IBS. My choices affect how I feel. It’s that simple.”